i'm through accepting limits (cause someone says they're so)
by LMoriarty
Summary: Kara Danvers has always known that one day, she would meet someone, and that would be it. Their eyes would meet, the colors would come in, and she'd be in love; simple as that. But then she meets Lena Luthor. (There are no colors).


Kara Danvers has always known that one day, she would meet someone, and that would be it. Their eyes would meet, the colors would come in, and she'd be in love; simple as that.

But then she meets Lena Luthor.

There are no colors, her life remains in black and white and shades of grey, but eventually, at some point, Kara falls in love with her anyways. She isn't sure when it happens — Kara has always been somewhat attracted to Lena, of course, but there is a difference between being attracted to someone and _being in love with them_ — and it's scary, in a way that nothing else has ever been.

Fighting aliens, she quickly learns, is a lot easier — and a lot less painful — than falling in love with someone who isn't your soulmate.

And Kara _is_ in love with Lena.

She shouldn't be, she knows. Even if soulmates weren't real, even if they weren't both destined to be with other people, Kara knows she still shouldn't have fallen for Lena. Her family, her friends— they all hate Lex, hate Luthor, and that means they'll hate Lena, will _have_ to hate Lena.

It would be one thing if they were soulmates, but they're _not soulmates_. Kara has nothing to hide behind, no colors that she can use to change their minds. Lena is a Luthor, will always be a Luthor, and there's nothing that she can do — that either of them can do — that will change that. Unfortunately for Kara, that only makes her like Lena even more. She knows what it's like to try to get out of another family member's shadow, remembers how desperate she was to make a name for herself outside of _Superman's cousin_. Kara knows _exactly_ what Lena is going through, when it comes down to it. Maybe Kal-El isn't a monster, maybe he doesn't kill innocent people, maybe he hasn't made an entire nation hate their family, but Kara has struggled regardless.

Everyone else may look at Lena and see nothing more than another Luthor, another person they need to be wary of, but Kara sees _Lena_ , sees the girl beneath the mask. Maybe that's why Kara fell for her so quickly. There are a lot of similarities, between the two of them. Kara is a lot more carefree, sure, and a lot more open, but deep down, she knows that both of them are very, very sad, and very, very lonely.

And so Kara loves her.

With everything she has, with a heart that still mourns Krypton, mourns Astra, mourns all the aliens that have died by her family's hands, she loves her.

(Lena loves her back, of course, but Kara doesn't know that, not yet.)

It's almost fitting, that everything goes wrong on Valentine's Day. Everyone around them is celebrating, making toasts declaring that perseverance and strength and _love_ always save the day, while Kara and Lena are faced with the heart wrenching realization that _nothing_ , not even love, not even _their_ love, can win forever.

It is quite possibly the saddest moment of Kara's life, since the destruction of her entire planet. She doesn't know how it could be anything else, when she is standing in front of the woman she loves and begging Lex Luthor to stand down.

In that moment, Kara isn't thinking about herself, or Kal-El, or the rest of the aliens on the planet. She isn't even thinking about her friends, or her family, or all the people that she will be forced to leave behind if she doesn't stop Lex.

She is thinking about Lena.

She is thinking about the girl that's standing behind her, the girl that she's fallen in love with, and Kara is struck with the sudden realization that _she might not make it out of this alive_. She might _die_ , and if she does, then she will die without ever telling Lena that she loves her.

"Do you have any last words?" Lex asks, and Kara wants to turn around, wants to face Lena. If there is anything that she needs to say before she dies, then it's the words _I love you_. Kara is incredibly tempted, too. The thought of telling Lena that she loves her, that them not being soulmates doesn't matter, not now, not when she's about to die, sounds like a really good idea.

Kara can't, she knows, but god does she want to.

Lex asks again, when she doesn't reply, and Kara thinks she knows why Kal-El hates the Luthor family so much. He's about to kill her, about to _exterminate_ her, and yet he still sounds like he cares, like he genuinely wants to know if she has anything that she needs to say before she dies.

Kara thinks she hates him, too, but not for the reasons that Kal-El hates him.

(Kara hates him because there is a girl standing behind her, and she is afraid).

"Do _you_?" Kara shoots back, but doesn't wait for a reply. Her eyes heat up and she's about to strike, but Lex just looks at her, and laughs. She doesn't know why — her heat vision can kill people, can kill _him_ — but she thinks that maybe that suit of his makes him more confident than it should. He's not invincible.

He's going to learn that, soon.

"You think that little display will frighten me?" Lex asks her. His laugh is loud, but still somewhat pleasant to listen to. "We both know you're not going to attack me with my sister right there."

"You wouldn't hurt her—"

Lex smirks. " _Try me_."

He's an unknown variable, a wildcard, and Kara hates him for it. She has no idea what he's willing to do, what he's not willing to do. All those people he's killed— what's his sister, after all that? Kara doesn't know how deep his hatred for Kal-El goes, doesn't know if he'll risk even his own sister if it means he'll get revenge. _Try me_ , he says, but Kara cannot, and they both know it.

"You would kill her?" Kara asks, even though she thinks she knows the answer. The only reason she met Lena in the first place is because Lex had sent someone to kill her. Kara can only hope that he isn't willing to do the deed himself. "Your own sister?"

He smiles, but says nothing.

"No, don't do that, don't act like her life means nothing," says Kara, sharply. He doesn't know, she realizes. He doesn't know they're actually related. And if anything can change his mind, she's sure it's that. "She's your _sister_ , Lex. She's a Luthor. A _blood_ Luthor. _Your little sister_. Look me in the eyes and tell me that means nothing to you."

" _Blood bonds us all_ ," Lex says, and Kara winces.

" _Lex_ ," says Lena, and there is a weight to his name that makes it difficult to listen. "Lex, please, you're _better_ than this—"

"Hush now, _sister_ ," Lex says. Kara almost regrets telling him, when she hears the emphasis he puts on the word. He doesn't deserve to know that Lena — lovely, lovely Lena — shares his blood, doesn't deserve to know that when he calls her sister, he isn't lying. "You don't want to get involved in this. Who knows, my aim could end up being a touch off, and down you go. Whoops."

"Don't talk to her," Kara demands, suddenly furious. Lena doesn't deserve this, after all she's been through. She put so much faith in him, and for him to turn out like _this_ — no, she deserves better. "Don't look at her, don't smile at her, don't—"

Lex steps forwards, slow but sure, and stares her down. "You remind me of him, you know. Your cousin. Of course, _he_ knew how to keep his _mouth shut_ —"

"Lena reminds me of you," Kara counters, and ignores the way Lena flinches. "She's so smart, did you know that? She's brilliant, and she's going to change the world, one day. Just like you. But she's going to change the world _for the better_."

" _I_ changed the world for the better—"

"No, you _ruined_ the world," Kara tells him, and there's no fear in her voice, in her posture. When Lex said that she wouldn't attack him with Lena there, he was right. She wouldn't fight him, not with her fists, not with her powers. But Kara is a reporter, is a _good_ reporter, and she is more than capable of fighting him with her _words_. "You think you're a hero, that you're saving the world? You're a _killer_ , Lex. You're a _monster_. This world doesn't _revere_ you, it _fears_ you. My cousin was right about—"

"Your cousin," Lex sneers, "is a _moron_. He flies around, pretending he's a good person, pretending he's a _hero_. He abandoned me the _second_ he realized how smart I was—"

"What are you _talking_ about?" asks Kara. Kal-El would have _told_ her if they were friends. "You've only ever been his enemy—"

"Enemy?" Lex repeats, incredulous. "Kal-El," and he spits out the name like it's poisonous, "is my _soulmate_."

Kara's blood runs cold. Kal-El's soulmate— is a Luthor. A _Luthor_. Kara wanted so _desperately_ for Lena to be her soulmate, and Kal-El— his soulmate is— it isn't _fair_. It isn't _fair_ that he gets a Luthor for his soulmate, and _she_ doesn't. She actually _loves_ Lena, cares for her in a way she doesn't care for anyone else, and yet it's _Kal-El_ who gets a Luthor? The universe, she's sure, must hate her. "He's—" Kara squeezes her eyes shut. "A Luthor and an El. Soulmates."

"Soulmates," he echoes. Lex sounds pleased, and Kara knows he can see her inner turmoil, can see how _angry_ his words have made her. "You look upset."

"He never told me—"

Lex grins. "That's not why you're upset, though, is it, Supergirl? You're not hurt, you're _mad_. Not at Kal-El for keeping this from you, you're mad at yourself, aren't you? Because you love a Luthor, but she _isn't_ your soulmate. How does that feel? Even _I_ never fell in love with someone I wasn't destined to be with—"

"No, but you _did_ try to _kill_ your soulmate," Kara reminds him, "which I think is actually worse, so, you know. There's that."

"You're not denying it," Lena says.

Kara turns, very slowly, to face her. "No," she agrees, "I'm not."

"You love me?" she asks. Lena sounds incredulous, and Kara can't tell if it's because they're not soulmates or because she never thought anyone could ever love _her_. Kara hopes, desperately, that it's the former. As crushing as it'll be to know that Lena doesn't love her back, that them not being soulmates is a factor that she cannot ignore, Kara thinks she'd rather _die_ than have Lena hate herself that much.

Kara meets her eyes. She doesn't want to say it, not now, not like this. "I mean— I don't _not_ love you," she says, helplessly. Kara has spent so many sleepless nights trying to figure out how to tell Lena how she feels, but this— _this_ is worse than every single scenario she had imagined put together. "You're really pretty and nice and smart and—"

"We're not soulmates," Lena reminds her.

"I know," says Kara. "But if soulmates can end up like _that_ ," and she points towards Lex, "if they can hate each other, and try to kill each other — if they can look destiny and fate in the face and say, _no_ , thank you, I don't _want_ this — then maybe soulmates don't always _start_ as soulmates. Maybe people can, I don't know, make _themselves_ into soulmates, or something. Maybe there's _hope_."

"Kara," Lena says, voice impossibly soft, "I don't think that's possible."

Kara spares Lex a glance, but he seems content to keep on watching so she steps closer to Lena, and then she does it again, and again, and again. There's barely any space between them, now. "Do you really believe that?" Kara asks, just as soft. She doesn't know what she will do if Lena says yes.

(She knows _exactly_ what she will do if Lena says no).

"I'm not saying it's not possible," Lena offers, "but there have been studies done, on soulmates, and there is no scientific evidence that supports your theory."

"But it's never been considered a theory, before, either," Kara reminds her. "Nobody was _looking_ for any evidence. If they do, who knows what they'll find? You just said it wasn't impossible, Lena, and by definition, that means it _is_ possible. I could be right."

"Yes," Lena concedes, "you could be right. Maybe. But—"

"Lena, do you _really_ believe that I'm wrong?" asks Kara. She is distinctly aware that Lex is watching their every move, is even finding it _amusing_ , but this, Kara thinks, takes precedent.

Lena thinks about it, seriously thinks about it, for a very long moment. "If it's not impossible, then it's possible," repeats Lena. "And your theory, no matter how strange, _isn't_ impossible, so— no."

"No?" Kara repeats, slowly. "No, as in—"

"No," says Lena, "I don't believe you're wrong."

Kara is kissing her before she has time to completely process the words. She doesn't touch her, isn't willing to initiate anything more than the kiss, but Lena has no such reservations. She's pulling Kara closer, closer, closer, and Kara can't bring herself to care that Lex is there, next to them, watching them. Lena's lips are soft on hers, and Kara knows it's not possible to fall anymore in love than she already has, but it almost feels like she just did.

It's still Kara who pulls away first.

She doesn't move very far, just enough so she can stare into Lena's eyes, a lovely green color, and— oh.

Her eyes are green.

Her eyes are _green_ , not black, not white, not varying shades of grey. Her eyes are green.

Kara can _see_ green.

"Lena—" Kara stops, swallows. "Maybe people can make themselves into soulmates," she repeats, softly, "or, maybe, sometimes, their bond just needs a little extra push. Can you— I mean—"

"Your eyes are _stunning_ ," Lena whispers. "They're blue, and just— I never thought that anything could ever be this pretty."

"My eyes are blue?" she whispers back, and Kara shouldn't be surprised, she knows people who have met their soulmates, but she's never thought to _ask_. "Yours are— they're _so green_." Kara leans in again, and presses her lips back to Lena's. This kiss is shorter, and it ends almost as quickly as it starts, but it's no less magical. "I love you, Lena," Kara tells her, and Lex laughs. She ignores him. "I would die for you."

She whips back around to face Lex. "I would _die_ for her," Kara repeats, louder. "Is that what I'm going to have to do, Lex? Die, protecting your _sister_ from _you_? You were friends, once."

"Before she tried to _fix_ me."

"Before she tried to _save you_ from _yourself_ ," Kara corrects. "You want to fight, Lex? _Let's fight_. Just leave her out of this." Kara smiles at him, but it's a sad smile, not at all like the one Lex has plastered on. His is charming, is confident— hers is just _tired_.

"You look like you're about to cry, and you want to _fight_ me?" Lex spreads his arms wide open. "Well, okay, then. Go ahead, _Kara_."

She closes her eyes, just for a second. Names are deadly, in a world with superheroes, and he knows her name, now. Kara can't help but be a little bit nervous, and she can only hope that he won't reveal it. "You could have made this world beautiful, Lex," Kara tells him, "but you're delusional if you think you're going to walk away from this a free man."

"Delusional? Me?" Lex smirks. "All I have to do is attack your little soulmate over there and you'll be _begging_ me to stand down."

"Is that what you want, Lex?" asks Kara. "Do you want me to beg? Because I will, if it means the people of this city are safe."

"I'm sure you would, Supergirl, but I don't particularly _care_ about what you are or aren't willing to do," he dismisses. "I'd rather watch Kal-El beg me to spare you, actually, but we both know he'd sooner watch you die, so— I think the extermination of all aliens sounds rather fun, don't you?"

Kara doesn't bother responding. She strikes, instead. Her eyes burn red, hot enough to melt entire worlds. The streams of light that slam into Lex are more than enough to kill him, but his footing doesn't even falter. She knows his suit is powerful, but to not even leave a mark— "Ah, yes," he says, glancing down at himself, "and then there's that. All those little tricks you and your cousin have up your sleeves? They won't work on me. If you want to fight, Zor-El, then we fight like men."

"I'm not a man," spits Kara, and her fist slams into his face. She twists her head and tells Lena to run, but the momentary distraction is enough for Lex to grab her and throw her to the ground. She easily rolls out of it, and it doesn't particularly hurt, but Kara knows this fight has only just begun.

At least, she thinks, Lena is safe.

"Your cousin," he taunts, grabbing her by the throat and tossing her back onto the floor, "is a better fighter than you are."

"How would you know?" Kara reminds him, tone not quite mocking. "You've been in jail for most of my fights, remember?" She slams her foot against the backs of his ankles, bringing both feet off the ground. Lex falls with a loud, satisfying thump.

He groans, but recovers quickly. "Just means I had a lot of time to study your technique," Lex says, and as she goes to kick him, he grabs her foot and flips her backwards.

Their remarks after that are less conversational and more cutting. They're intended to hurt, to throw the other off their game. Lex, with all his charm, should have the advantage, Kara knows, but he doesn't. She knows what his weak spot is, and Kara knows more about Kal-El than anyone else on the planet, than even Lex.

Kara doesn't know if she will win the war, if she will survive, but this battle of words? Kara has already won, and they both know it.

Eventually, the words come to a halt, and it's just punch after punch after punch. Lex may have said that Kal-El is a better fighter, may have even believed it, but Kara is sure this fight will change his mind. Kara is a force to be reckoned with, she knows. Girls like her always are.

She slams her fist directly into Lex's face, and he returns the favor, but his nose is bleeding, and hers is not.

(Her fists are made of iron. Of course he bleeds).

The fight drags on.

Kara isn't sure how long they've been fighting, anymore. It feels like minutes, it feels like hours. What she does know is that she _recognizes_ that sound, it's the click of a gun being chambered, and—

"Are you done?" asks Lena, and as she stands there, gun in hand, Kara swears she's staring at an angel.

"Lena," says Lex, almost chidingly, "put the gun away, and leave the fighting to the big kids. You don't want to get hurt."

"Neither do you," she says, and then pauses, as if waiting for him to deny it. He doesn't. "Get away from Kara."

Lex puts his hands up, almost mockingly, and takes one, two, three steps to his left. "Far enough?" he asks, amused. Kara wonders why he even listens — if her powers can't phase him, she doubts a bullet can — but thinks that maybe he's simply growing tired. She knows she would be, if she was human.

"No," she says, "One more step." After he does so, Lena turns her gaze on Kara. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," says Kara. "Are you?"

Lena laughs, and Kara can't help but compare it to Lex's. When he laughs, the sound is beautiful, but mocking; always mocking. When _Lena_ laughs, however, it sounds like something that would come from an angel. "It's Valentine's Day, and I just kissed my soulmate," Lena reminds her. "I'm doing great, Kara."

Kara grins. "Have you contacted the DEO, for Lex? He needs to be taken into custody."

Lena winces. "Actually, I kinda called—"

"Me," says Kal-El, landing beside her.

Kara doesn't look at him, doesn't think she can even if she wants to. Instead, she looks at Lex. It's almost like everything about him changes the second Kal-El arrives; he looks like a completely different person. Where he was once all smiles and cutting insults and confidence, Lex's features are now drained of any emotion, and he looks almost dead inside. Kara wonders if it's because of the soulmate bond, because they both rejected it.

"Are you ready to go back to prison, Luthor?" Kal-El asks, voice cold, eyes colder. There are no signs in his posture, in his words, that point towards Lex being his soulmate, and Kara is offended on his behalf. It's one thing to dismiss your soulmate the way they have, but to pretend it never even happened—

"Are you going to cuff me, Superman?" Lex asks, and it should be teasing, but it's not. There are no inflictions in his words, no signs of amusement on his face. He almost looks sad, staring over at his soulmate, and for a split second, Kara forgets about all the people he's killed, all the lives he's ruined, and feels sorry for him.

(It's only for a second, of course. Lena is still there, wary, afraid, and Kara loves her too much to ever think of Lex as anything but a monster).

Kal-El doesn't seem to even notice his subdued demeanor, or if he does, he doesn't show it. "Am I going to need to?" he asks.

Lex pauses, and then—

"How's your little reporter doing?" he sneers. His words are supposed to hurt, but they only end up hurting himself. "Still sad that your soul belongs to someone else?"

Kara freezes. Kal-El had told her that _Lois_ is his soulmate, and maybe— maybe he isn't lying. Nobody knows what happens when you reject a soul bond. "Kal-El," she says, because this might destroy Lex, and Kara is too nice to want that, no matter how much she dislikes him, "don't—"

"Oh, you didn't know?" Kal-El asks, tone suddenly pleasant. "Lex, as soon as you tried to kill me, our bond broke. The colors were gone. And then I kissed Lois and, well. What can I say? _Maybe people can make themselves into soulmates_."

Kara stares. There's no way he could have known she said that, not unless he was there, which he _wasn't_. Unless— if the DEO knows Lex is free, and they do, then wouldn't the first person they tell be Kal-El? He may have been there the entire time, just waiting for the moment time to swoop in. How else could Lena have gotten in contact with him? "How—"

"Are you going to come willingly, Lex, or will I need to force you?" asks Kal-El. "It's Valentine's Day. I have a /soulmate/ I need to get back to."

There's nothing to say, after that. His words are meant to hurt, and they do.

Kara expects Lex to do something — reveal another plan, throw kryptonite at them, _something_ — but he doesn't, just stares at Kal-El. "Lena is a Luthor, Kara," Lex says, very quietly, without looking at her. "It's not going to last."

And then— he's gone, back to another prison cell, her cousin with him.

Kara is almost disappointed by how anticlimactic it all ends up being, but when she turns to look at Lena, she can't bring herself to care.

She has a soulmate.

She has a _Luthor_.

"What did he say?" Lena asks, heels clicking against the cement as she steps closer to her. "I couldn't hear, although I imagine it wasn't particularly flattering."

"Doesn't matter," says Kara, smiling. "He was wrong, anyway."

"So, we should talk, right?" Lena gestures between them. "This is— obviously very new, so we should probably set some ground rules or something; talk logistics."

Her smile falters. "Logistics," Kara echoes, numbly. Lex's words echo in her head. It's not going to last, it's not going to last, _it's not going to last_. She tries to push his taunt from her mind, but doesn't do a very good job, not really. Lex may not have powers like hers, or like Kal-El's, but he _does_ have powers. Nobody else, Kara is sure, can fill her with this much doubt. "Uh, right. Yeah. We should— do that."

"Kara," Lena says, and then stops. She tries again. "Before we do, um— what you said, earlier. About loving me. Did you mean that?"

"Yes," she says, without hesitation, because not even Lex can change that.

Lena smiles, and Kara can't remember ever seeing her so happy. It's like everything has finally sunk in — Lex being back in prison, Kara being her _soulmate_ — and she looks angelic. Kara knows that if angels exist, then they must look like Lena does, here. With the sun shining down from behind her, and green eyes that practically sparkle, Kara can't think of anything more gorgeous. "I love you too," Lena tells her, and then she pulls her in for a kiss.

As soon as their lips touch, all of Kara's doubts fade away. There's no room for second guessing when Lena's hands fit so perfectly into the curves of Kara's waist. It's like their bodies are built for this, for each other. Kara deepens the kiss, presses their bodies a little closer together. Her senses are screaming, burning every detail of this moment into her memory. She can feel every molecule around them, in the space between them, and Kara can't help but pull away, gasping for air.

"That was—"

Lena laughs, and entwines their fingers. "I know," she says, and Kara thinks she might.

"So, about those ground rules?" hints Kara, because she wants to get that over with, go back to kissing Lena.

"I only have one," says Lena. "Don't lie to me. I can deal with you being a part time reporter, part time superhero. It'll be harder, but I can even deal with you putting your life at risk every other night. Just, please, don't ever lie to me."

"Okay," says Kara. "I can do that."

"Then tell me what Lex said to you," suggests Lena, "and tell me why you couldn't quite look me in the eyes after I mentioned us needing to talk."

"He said— well, he said, 'Lena is a Luthor, Kara. It isn't going to last'," she admits, and forces herself to not look away. "And I know he's wrong, okay? It's just— he's been through this, already. With Kal-El. If anyone knows when something isn't going to last, it's him, and I just, I was afraid. That he was right. I get he only said it to make me doubt us, that it was just some stupid taunt, but— I don't know. It's his superpower, I guess. He's very good at hurting people."

"Almost as good as Superman," Lena says.

Kara stares. "What?"

"His comments, about having another soulmate? That wasn't necessary, Kara, it was just cruel," she tells her. "I don't blame him for saying it — I'm sure I would have done the same thing — but it _definitely_ wasn't necessary. You must have seen that, you even tried to stop him."

"Yeah," agrees Kara, softly, and then looks away. "Are you mad at me?"

"What, for letting my brother get to you?" Lena shakes her head. "No, Kara, I'm not mad at you. I know how good he is at manipulating people. But you _do_ know he's wrong, right? I might be a Luthor, but this," and she holds up their hands, "is real."

"I know it's real," Kara assures her, "I know _we're_ real. I love you, I'm always going to love you— that's not going to change, not ever."

"I can't believe how lucky I am," Lena murmurs. "Of all the people my soulmate could have ended up being, I'm _so glad_ it's you."

"Do you want to come to my house?" asks Kara.

She doesn't know how this will work out, not really. Lena is still a Luthor, Kara is still an El— that will never stop being an obstacle, even if they are soulmates. Their families will still fight, will still try to kill each other, and they will always be stuck in the middle of that; not even a soul bond can change that.

But if they love each other — and they _do_ love each other — then shouldn't they try anyways?

Kara has overcome a lot, on her own. Astra, Non, all the other aliens from Fort Rozz— their captures, their _deaths_ , are, for the most part, on her. She's fought entire armies, if you think about it, and Kara _does_ think about it. She's suffered and endured and suffered some more, without a soulmate to help her through it. Lena has, too. With Luthor for her last name, she's had no choice but to overcome obstacles. The entire nation was pitted against her from the start, just waiting to see her fail. With Lex for a brother and Luthor for a last name, nobody would be sad to watch everything she worked for fail. If they can get through all that by themselves, then imagine what they can do _together_.

Destroy the world, maybe. Or, perhaps, if they're very lucky, they can _save_ it.

Kara doesn't know what will happen next, what obstacles they will have to face, what villains they will have to battle—

"I would love to."

—but she knows that they'll do it together.


End file.
